I’ll admit, I’m not perfect, but what did the horse I rode in on do?
I just read a list of “100 things to do before you die.” I was surprised “yell for help” wasn’t on the list
I was so poor I couldn’t pay attention. So I’m stupid, too
I’ve gotten to that age where nothing fits right any more. Even my birthday suit needs ironing
Words will open a lot of doors for you. Push and pull
I woudln’t be who I am if I wasn’t what I am
Yesterday, I screwed in a lightbulb. Later, I crossed a road and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.
I love ATH viewers unconditionally, with a few conditions
Always remember to be nice to the people who have access to your toothbrush
Today, I broke my own personal record for most consecutive days lived
Full lunar eclipse of the blackboard
Don’t let the solar eclipse darken your day
What really happens during a solar eclipse
Mind over matter, except my mind doesn’t matter