I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know
I’m a huge fan of space. Both outer and personal
The older I get, the earlier it gets late
Just bought some Halloween candy that won’t make it to Halloween
I like Switzerland’s flag
I called a psychic for an interview. He said I won’t show up
Why buy a bed when it’s so easy to fall asleep on a sofa?
Smoke detectors batteries always die and squeak at 3 A.M.
I like extra fries more than exercise
I favor exorcism over exercise
I’m no good at math. Go figure
Was fired by cement company, but wasn’t given a concrete reason
Dreamed last night I ate a pillow. Woke up with cotton mouth
When playing in Canada you have to bring eh game
If 3 of 4 people suffer with cavities, does the other enjoy them?
I shot my age in golf on my birthday. I quit after 12 holes
Because a broker invested my money I’m broker
Electrician sent me a bill for $2,000. I was shocked
Boomerang I threw yesterday hasn’t come back. I’m scared
National Pirate Day! Willie St-aargh-ell my favorite