Woody’s Chalkboards (2020)

Quip Date Note
Merry and Happy. 2021 won't be so crappy Dec. 22, 2020
Forget elf on the shelf. Drow on the show Dec. 22, 2020
Please send PJs. Been wearing same pair on ATH for 10 months Dec. 17, 2020
Nobody knows about Olive the other reindeer Dec. 17, 2020
Where's George Bailey when we need him now? Dec. 15, 2020
Worst holiday gift I got last year was a 2020 planner Dec. 15, 2020
I'm amazed at how panelists know so little. Especially me Dec. 7, 2020
I sold my 60-year press pass collection to Bob Dylan for $812 Dec. 7, 2020
I'm street smart. Sesame Street smart Nov. 30, 2020
I don't think before offering an opinion. I want to be surprised like you Nov. 30, 2020
Give thanks Thursday for social distancing 600 miles from relatives Nov. 23, 2020
Today I stuff 3 turkeys: Clinton, Tim, Frank. Tony is gravy Nov. 23, 2020 Clinton = Clinton Yats, another panelist on the show. Tim = Tim Cowlishaw, another panelist on the show. Frank = Frank Isola, another panelist on the show. Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH
If I win award for being lazy, I will send Tony to get it Nov. 18, 2020 Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH
When this is over, I still want you to distance Nov. 18, 2020
I don't know how to act my age. I've forgotten how old I am Nov. 11, 2020
If I score less than 35 points, I'm demanding a recount Nov. 11, 2020
My superpower is I'm superstitious Nov. 6, 2020
Kanye 60K votes? I'm running next time Nov. 6, 2020
I voted. You still have time Nov. 3, 2020
I'm in best shape of my life. Round is a great shape. Nov. 3, 2020
Sarcasm is my only redeeming quality Oct. 29, 2020
Don't follow in my footsteps. I walk into walls Oct. 29, 2020
Blackboard has gone to the pool Oct. 15, 2020
Tony is moderator of debait & switch Oct. 14, 2020 Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH
I'm ESPN's PEZ dispenser Oct. 14, 2020
While Sarah talks I eat Snickers and I snicker Sep. 25, 2020 Sarah = Sarah Spain, another panelist
Laugh at me, Reali, and the world laughs with you. Mute me, and you mute alone Sep. 25, 2020
Yes, I do pound sand -- in bunkers and at beach Sep. 15, 2020
Don't bet on me to win today. You'll see why soon Sep. 15, 2020
I'm not doing a deep dive today; I'm going much deeper Sep. 8, 2020
I'm the chairman of the chalkboard; Reali is hair apparent Sep. 8, 2020
When you rip me on Twitter spell "you're" correctly Sep. 4, 2020
Will NBA playoffs MVP get invitation to Disney World? Sep. 4, 2020
I have split personalities. Allow me to introduce my selves Aug. 28, 2020
I'd agree with Sarah today, but we'd both be wrong Aug. 28, 2020
My back hurts from carrying this show Aug. 21, 2020
My pet parrot stopped talking to me Aug. 21, 2020
My books are smarter than Tony Reali's books Aug. 12, 2020
My local baker went on vacation. Call it loaf management Aug. 12, 2020
Better to be a witty fool than a foolish wit Jul. 31, 2020
Spent hours looking for phone using flashlight on my phone Jul. 31, 2020
Treat strangers like you treat your dog Jul. 23, 2020
House flooded? Need help? I Noah guy Jul. 23, 2020
I diet everyday after 7 pieces of bacon Jul. 16, 2020
Decided to cheer for the Dolphins this year on porpoise Jul. 16, 2020
Our pilot said on loud speaker: "I'm working from home today" Jul. 9, 2020
I'm hoarding german sausage and cheese for würst káse scenario Jul. 9, 2020
Sawdust is man glitter Jul. 2, 2020
At least I'm not predictable Jul. 2, 2020
T-rex died because he couldn't wash hands Jun. 17, 2020
I'm just here to establish an alibi Jun. 17, 2020
DO NOT READ THE NEXT SENTENCE Jun. 11, 2020
My advice is to never listen to my advice Jun. 11, 2020
That's a terrible idea. What time? Jun. 3, 2020
Tony doesn't need Google. He can ask me May. 28, 2020
I pressed spacebar. I'm still on Earth May. 22, 2020
I'm here what are your next 2 wishes May. 19, 2020
You can't be late if you don't show up May. 19, 2020
I've made smarter love choices than Pilot Pete Mar. 11, 2020
I've stopped being friends with my mime. He won't speak to me Mar. 11, 2020
I wanted to be shepherd. I like their pie. But I'm too sheepish Mar. 9, 2020
Here I go again. Ride starts now! Keep hands inside car at all times Mar. 9, 2020
My madness is not limited to March Mar. 6, 2020
Best "Rocky Balboa" quotes? I had 3. All were cut from movie Mar. 6, 2020
Panelists have combined age of 257 and ATH record of 1714.5-5140 and a WAR of -357.8 Mar. 5, 2020
Four panelists today used to close bars together. Meeting today for early-bird buffet Mar. 5, 2020
I own a condo inside Reali's mind Mar. 3, 2020 Reali = Tony Reali, the host of ATH
I'm afraid of getting fired during commercial break. Stay tuned Mar. 3, 2020
My 30 seconds today goes without saying Mar. 2, 2020
Went to trampoline center. Was thrown out by bouncer Mar. 2, 2020
Be patient. I'll be eliminated from the show at the end of this segment Feb. 28, 2020
My winning percentage on ATH is above the Mendoza Line. Barely Feb. 28, 2020
If I can't convince you I will confuse you Feb. 27, 2020
I chalk up my blackboard inadequacy to poor potty training Feb. 27, 2020
My kitchen doesn't have any unhealthy snacks...I've eaten them all Feb. 26, 2020
Dias sailed around the horn. I assail Around The Horn Feb. 26, 2020
When I awoke today I didn't expect to be this witty and charming Feb. 20, 2020
I still don't get Reali's scoring system and fashion statement Feb. 20, 2020 Reali = Tony Reali, that host of ATH
There's no "we" in M&M's. Don't even ask Feb. 19, 2020
I'm not responsible for the faces I make when Sarah talks Feb. 19, 2020 Sarah = Sarah Spain, another panelist on the show
I'm in a good place in life. Sitting near buffet line Feb. 17, 2020
I can't even get the voices in my head to talk to me Feb. 17, 2020
Happy Hour should last about 300 minutes Feb. 14, 2020
Shoutout to Kevin Love, Bobby Valentine, Ron Darling, Bret Hart, Candy Maldonado Feb. 14, 2020
Put a dollar in the change machine, but I'm still the same Feb. 13, 2020
I don't know how to act my age. I'm not an actor Feb. 13, 2020
Reali treats me like AA batteries. I'm never included Feb. 11, 2020
For Valentine's Day I'm sending telekinetic gifts. It's the thought that counts Feb. 11, 2020
Everybody wants to see "my name" on the blackboard. "My Name" Feb. 7, 2020
Nothing to see here today. Move on to Woody's face Feb. 7, 2020
Glued my eyes shut. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it Feb. 4, 2020
Getting you forget-me-nots for valentine's. Please remind me Feb. 4, 2020
My favorite times of every day, hands down, are 6:30 Jan. 28, 2020
It's unfair that you can mute me with your remote, too Jan. 28, 2020
I've always wanted to be a monk, but got no chance Jan. 24, 2020
I've just been voted to Hall of Mediocre (unanimously) Jan. 24, 2020
Kindergarten cop got me for resisting a rest Jan. 20, 2020
I miss NFL Runnerup Bowl. Titans-Packers? Who you got? Jan. 20, 2020
Should I talk about sodium today? Na Jan. 16, 2020
Math wiz daughter explained infinity to me. She went on forever Jan. 16, 2020
I prefer monorails. I have a one-track mind Jan. 14, 2020
When Tony speaks Akkadian, he does like to Babylon Jan. 14, 2020
Tony asked to imitate flamingo today, but I put my foot down Jan. 10, 2020
I fell into upholstery machine, but I'm recovered Jan. 10, 2020
Want to start pro hide-and-seek league, but good players are tough to find Jan. 9, 2020
I just bought rare 17th century painting. I'm baroque Jan. 9, 2020
My 2020 Goal: fewer mutes, more cowbell Jan. 8, 2020
Pay no attention to closed-captioning. Misquotes me Jan. 8, 2020