Woody’s Chalkboards (2022)

Quip Date Note
Nobody else on this panel can drive a stick. Dec. 14, 2022
I'm not condescending or sending holiday cards to inferior people. Dec. 14, 2022
I presented Judge with wit of habeus corpuscle. Dec. 7, 2022
Did 100 sumo squats before ATH. Won't do didly squat during the show. Dec. 7, 2022
New ATH segment called Binary or Cell. Dec. 2, 2022
I created the American Apathy Association. Nobody became a member. Dec. 2, 2022
Tim's Thanksgiving tradition Nov. 22, 2022 Can of Spam taped to chalkboard.
Tim = Tim Cowlishaw, another panelist on the show [pic]
Sarah's special secret recipe. Nov. 22, 2022 Can of cranberry sauce taped to chalkboard [pic]
Tony is the man, the myth, the mute monster. Nov. 15, 2022
I hate losing. Especially weight. Nov. 15, 2022
You still have time. Vote. Nov. 8, 2022
If you can read this, so what? You can read. Nov. 8, 2022
ATH has lasted 20 years. I'm surprised I lasted 20 shows. Nov. 4, 2022
ATH's American Idle champion for 20 years. Nov. 4, 2022
I have the ability to annoy all of the other panelists. Nov. 2, 2022
I saw all the great bands before they and I got old. Nov. 2, 2022
The Lakers had showtime. I own showdown. Oct. 28, 2022
Act like I'm not here. I do. Oct. 28, 2022
I've decided to become a limited edition. Oct. 21, 2022
I'm eliminating bad choices from my life. You are one. Oct. 21, 2022
My ATH warning to Tony Reali: This is not a drill. Oct. 19, 2022
Critique of Amazon Thursday Night Football? I'll send you my opinion in two days. Oct. 19, 2022
Producer checked my ears before the show. Found 40 cents. Oct. 10, 2022
Wish I had a quarter for every bad quarter of football I've seen this season. Oct. 10, 2022
I just hit my funny bone. It is not humerus. Oct. 5, 2022
I don't think before I talk on ATH. I want to be surprised like you. Oct. 5, 2022
I drank 5 hour energy six hours ago. What now? Sep. 28, 2022
The college band drum major did not pass percussion protocol. Sep. 28, 2022
Biblical Sarah lived until she was 127. We should all be so lucky. Sep. 21, 2022
I do everything in moderation except moderation. Sep. 21, 2022
I wanted to run away from home. My dad said he would drive me. Sep. 14, 2022
Why would bottled water have an expiration date? Sep. 14, 2022
Big day planned. I think I'll get my car, my teeth and my colon clened. Sep. 7, 2022
I'm poor now. I used to have dough when I worked for Wonder Bread. Sep. 7, 2022
I always go the extra mile. Then I drive back to the right exit. Aug. 31, 2022
My daily exercise is getting my legs into underwear. Aug. 31, 2022
So thrilled ATH was off for three weeks. I didn't get muted once. Aug. 25, 2022
We were off so long I forgot how the scoring system works. Aug. 25, 2022
My idea of going out now is driving to the Walgreens pharmacy. Jul. 28, 2022
I started my two-week diet Tuesday. Finished it in six hours, 12 minutes. Jul. 28, 2022
Growing up was the worst idea I've ever had. So I haven't. Jul. 26, 2022
Want my computer to respond: Nice try on password. Close enough. Jul. 26, 2022
I'll try anaything once, except Justin's barber. Jul. 21, 2022 Justin = Justin Tinsley, another panelist on the show
My appearance on the horn today feels like a final I didn't study for Jul. 21, 2022
In Spanish the Los Angeles Angels are The Angels Angels and redundantly bad. Jul. 15, 2022
Picture your image here. Jul. 15, 2022
For me Buy or Sell always becomes bye and sail. Jul. 13, 2022
I am a nobody. Nobody is perfect. Therefore, I'm perfect. Jul. 13, 2022
Keep caml and proofread. Jun. 22, 2022
I interrupted a great day to do this show. Jun. 22, 2022
Interestingly, I am interesting. Jun. 14, 2022
I'm so old I was fan of 1913 U.S. Open Champ. We met. Jun. 14, 2022
Judge me not on ATH, Tony, lest ye be judged as host. Jun. 9, 2022 Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH
I'm going all carpe diem on this show. Jun. 9, 2022
I should never be elected. I approve this message. Jun. 3, 2022
Keep friends close and enemas closer. Jun. 3, 2022
Actually, I'd rather be a matador. May. 18, 2022
I want to play hide and seek with bigfoot. May. 18, 2022
I feel old until I realize Bob Ryan is older. May. 11, 2022
Don't ask Clinton about his derby trip. It's a waste of your time. May. 11, 2022 Clinton = Clinton Yates, another panelist on the show
Clerk asked me for my ID. Gave him my stone tablet. May. 4, 2022
Today Goliath beats David. May. 4, 2022
New TV series "Losing Time" about me on ATH Apr. 20, 2022
Played golf. Shot my age. I look good for 102. Apr. 20, 2022
Checked my spam. Got email from Hormel, which makes Spam. Apr. 13, 2022
I hope everyone is glued to the TV for this show. Stick with us. Apr. 13, 2022
If I'm behind by only five points, I should be in showdown Mar. 30, 2022
Giannis, you block shots, I tell the jokes Mar. 30, 2022
Sold one of my cars to buy gas for the other Mar. 24, 2022
Think I know where my lost hot iron is, but I can't put my finger on it Mar. 24, 2022
I'm juiced for the big orange. GO VOLS!! Mar. 14, 2022
Brady comeback, and kind of fool can see, Bucs can't live without you Mar. 14, 2022
In high school I was voted most likely to get 0 followers Mar. 11, 2022
When younger generation rewrites history it will be misspelled and have no punctuation Mar. 11, 2022
Am I the only grocery shopper who can't open produce plastic bags? Mar. 2, 2022
My tolerance for stupid panelists is very low today. Stay tuned... Mar. 2, 2022
As I stare into the mirror I say 'That can't be right' Feb. 16, 2022
I replied to my friend's wedding invitation: Can't come. Maybe next time Feb. 16, 2022
My bucket list: Feb. 9, 2022
Growing up was the worst idea I ever had. So I haven't. Feb. 9, 2022
My inside NFL sources are Uber driver and pizza delivery guy Feb. 4, 2022
Want my computer to respond: Nice try on password. Close enough Feb. 4, 2022
Before every ATH I tell myself to win. Myself never listens. Jan. 18, 2022
I'm drinking today from my cooper cup. Jan. 18, 2022
I'm available for NFL GM interviews for $5 Jan. 14, 2022
Tony penalizes me for disconcerting distractions Jan. 14, 2022 Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH
My love for fellow Coloradans in Boulder County fires who lost a thousand homes Jan. 5, 2022
In 2022 at the end of the day te bottom line will be what I bring to the table on ATH Jan. 5, 2022