Life is too short for cheap wine, cheap toilet paper and cheap men.
Hey, McCarthy, The Wizards lost 10 straight.
In 1555 Nostradamus predicted I would win ATH today.
Nobody else on this panel can drive a stick.
I’m not condescending or sending holiday cards to inferior people.
I presented Judge with wit of habeus corpuscle.
Did 100 sumo squats before ATH. Won’t do didly squat during the show.
I created the American Apathy Association. Nobody became a member.
Tim’s Thanksgiving tradition
Note: Can of Spam taped to chalkboard.
Tim = Tim Cowlishaw, another panelist on the show [pic]
Sarah’s special secret recipe.
Open Can. Serve.
Note: Can of cranberry sauce taped to chalkboard [pic]
You still have time. Vote.
If you can read this, so what? You can read.
ATH has lasted 20 years. I’m surprised I lasted 20 shows.
ATH’s American Idle champion for 20 years.
I have the ability to annoy all of the other panelists.
I saw all the great bands before they and I got old.