Archaeologists will date any old thing

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Joseph Laguerre, Dan Salvetti, Mark Wood, Matt Rolder, Bob Ballou, Bryan Larson, Tarique Mansur

Your lucky numbers are 1, 7, 19, 27, 30

Digital Scroller: Word of the day is word-out: a way to mark the end of a conversation

You can tune a guitar, but you can’t tuna fish

Digital Scroller: Early bird special: Adande lounge crockpot sour stroganoff

Who put a stop payment on my reality check?

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Steven Anderson, Bryan Legal, Zohaib Saeed, Heather Hyde, Jason Fitzgerald, Billy Fisher, Brian Anthony Carr, Dallin Finlinson

Why does sour cream have an expiration date?

Digital Scroller: Early bird special: cheesy potato au gra-Tim

Worship me and we’ll get along just fine

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Brian Davis, Shantiece Bridges, Football Diner, Apolo Ohno, happy bday Fred Biletnikoff

My job is so secret - even I don’t know what it is

Digital Scroller: Word of the day is yupscale: affluent in a hip way

Bottomless pit of needs and wants

Note: Arrow pointing at Woody

Digital Scroller: Early bird special: Gene’s all you can eat meatless slop buffet

All life’s answers are on this show

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Herbie Montemayor, Eric Wright, Chris Peek, Elliot Stranger, Happy 60th bday Julius Erving

My 30 seconds next!

Note: Woody did not win.

Digital Scroller: twitter.com/woodypaige

A pessimist is never disappointed

Digital Scroller: Word of the day is hippinese: the dialect of hippies

Adult child of alien invaders

Note: Arrow pointing at Woody [pic]

Digital Scroller: Early bird special: Cowlishaw’s secret jellied moose nose

I got street crud

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Jason Floyd, Kyle Wilkerson, Harry Mumane, Chris Ost, Evan Lysacek, Brian Boitano, Carmelo Anthony

The next American idle

Note: Arrow pointing at Woody [pic]

Digital Scroller: Early bird special: Woody’s famous rocky mountain oysters

4 out of 5 voices in my head say “Go for it”

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Lindsey Vonn, Shani Davis, Terry Bleeks, Elanor Kennedy, Phillip Clifford, Randi Lynn Evans

A pediatrician is a doctor of little patience

Digital Scroller: Word of the day is fojo: female mojo

A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking

Digital Scroller: Lunch special: Jackie mac and cheese with a side of chowder

I fix tires for a flat rate

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Brad Davenport, Mike Salas, Scott Pimm, Shaun White and the double-McTwist

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds

Digital Scroller: Lunch special: Wojo Sauerkraut and smoked pork kielbosso $5.99

Gasoline with carrot juice, you get beta mileage

Digital Scroller: Shout-out to: Fat Tuesday, Bode Miller, happy bday John McEnroe and Ice-T, Austin Parker, Mark and Luann Lester, BC Works

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