Woody’s Chalkboards

It’s a small world. Unless you have to walk.

I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use one

Money talks but all mine ever says is “Goodbye”

Note: This is Woody's 1,300th appearance on ATH. [pic]

I’m going to start thinking positive, but I know it won’t work

For sale:
Wedding dress. Size 10. Worn once by mistake.

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder

Always wanted to be a procrastinator, but never got around to it

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died

Do people in Australia call the rest of the world “up over”?

If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

Does killing time damage eternity?

I’m in shape. Round’s a shape.

Anything is possible if you don’t know what you’re talking about

Give Tony a penny for his thoughts, and he will give you change

I have no intention of telling you my real name

I know it all, I just can’t remember it simultaneously

I tried being reasonable once - I didn’t like it

We met in a past life and you were wrong then too

I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks

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