College: $100 for a book. $300 to prove you read it.
There aren’t enough days in the weekend
Age only matter if you’re cheese
He who throws dirt loses ground
Don’t hate yourself in the morning. Sleep til noon.
Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?
It’s a small world, unless you have to clean it.
Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
If we quit voting will they all go away?
Try spelling Evian backwards. Naive.
If ignorance is bliss, why is Jay so sad?
Note: Jay = Jay Mariotti, another panelist on the show
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person
It’s not how you pick your nose, but where you put your booger
My favorite mythical creature? The honest politician.
He does the
work of 3 men
Larry, Moe
and Curly</p>
Note: I notice that Woody does not use the Oxford comma.
I look way better in person.
I saw Elvis. He sat between me and bigfoot on the UFO.
I was the next door kid’s imaginary friend
PAIGE
Note: Had an "eye" between the "A" and "G" in his name. During the introductions, he had an aluminum "model" of the balloon boy balloon flying in front of him as he did his impression of the reporters covering that story. [pic]
I am not young enough to know everything.
About Woody’s Chalkboard
This is an ongoing list of Woody Paige’s chalkboard/blackboard quips from the ESPN show “Around The Horn”. This list was started in January 2008. You can read more about Woody’s chalkboard.
Additionally, you can get an RSS feed.
You can find Woody at woodypaige.com, on Facebook, Twitter, The Denver Post, and the Colorado Springs Gazette.
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