There’s no final four on ATH. There’s only 1.
Whatever kind of look you were going 4, you missed Mariotti!

Note: Mariotti = Jay Mariotti, another panelist on the show

I’m trying to imagine you with a personality Mariotti!

Note: Mariotti = Jay Mariotti, another panelist on the show

Well, this day was a total waste of makeup
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
How do I set a laser printer to stun?
Everytime I get it together I forget where I put it
How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
Change is inevitable except from vending machines
I was lost but now I’m found

Note: The blackboard was missing from the first segment of the show.

Rock is dead. Long live paper & scissors.
I am not infantile, you stinky poopyhead
Chaos, panic, and disorder. My work here is done.
What if the hokey pokey really is what it’s all about?
If you are what you eat, I’m fast, cheap, & easy
Excess is never too much in moderation
Practice safe lunch use a condiment
I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs
Don’t try this at home I’m an amateur
All I ask is that you treat me no differently than a king
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