When I lose today I want participation ribbon and parting gifts
If I can be on TV, so can you. Send for my brochure. $11,538
No animals were hurt during the making of this show. My feelings were
I woke up on wrong side of bed today. In the wrong house
My lousy car won’t autocorrect
The Knicks shouldn’t buy lottery tickets this week
Jeopardy category: Fools named Stugotz

Note: Stugotz was another panelist on this episode

I held sign at airport today that said:
“Godot”

Cut me some slack. I’m doing my best
This blackboard may include sensitive content

Note: some words censored [pic]

Early to bed, early to rise, Ben Franklin? Go fly a kite!
I’m not easy on the eyes. Or the ears. But I smell good
I am a professional puntificator

My world-famous chili recipe:
Open can. Heat. Eat

In B or S I’m crossing to the dork side
Welcome to the game of clones! Arya ready?

Warning!
Don’t step on my guard dog

I have a better chance of being drafted than winning this show
I’m just here for the points and the snacks
Linkedin just emailed me. I’m qualified as Sherwin-Williams color mixer
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