Woody’s Chalkboards

Today I’m so aggressive I’ll surround the horn.

I have selective hearing. I’ve selected not to listen to Tony today.

Note: Tony = Tony Reali, the host of ATH

Where does the time go?
The wrong place once every year.

Ben Franklin was wrong. Early to bed, early to rise makes a man miss west coast NBA games.

I’m not ascending.
I’m condescending.

I read the terms and conditions. Don’t understand either.

My death has been a living hell

Betelgeuse
Betelgeuse
Betelgeuse
→
RIP

Raise your hand if you agree with me. Thanks to both of you.

It’s getting late.
Vote early.

Today I showed up too late to extrapolate.

Pedro-Woodrow.
Yeah, that’s the ticket.

With politicians speaking in Colorado today, could be sighting of aurora bore all us.

Hello Plaschke,
my old friend. I’ve come to banter with you again.

Note: Plaschke = Bill Plaschke, another panelist on the show

I’m polling way ahead in the state of confusion.

In high school I was voted least likely to succeed.
They were right.

Emily & I agree the ampersand is a worthless symbol, eh.

Note: Emily = Emily Kaplan, another panelist on the show

Attention:
I’m selling two-bit coins.
Send me two dimes and a nickel.

Text me when you get nowhere.

I’m threatening myself for stupidity.

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