Woody’s Chalkboards

Christmas
The only time of year where you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of socks

“Rapping paper”

For a detective, a surprise party is the ultimate insult

Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents’ job.

Sometimes I question my sanity, but the unicorn in the kitchen told me I’m fine

An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough

Tony has a vested interest in me losing today

Note: Tony = Tony Reali, and he was wearing a vest

You look really funny doing that with your head

If I had a dollar for every time algebra has helped me, I’d have ‘n’ dollars

The plateau is the highest form of flattery

I speak three languages, English, profanity and sarcasm

All those who believe in psychokinesis, raise my hand

I’m a perfectionist with a procrastinator complex. Some day I’m going to be awesome

It’s OK if you disagree with me. I can’t force you to be right

I’m not random; you just can’t think as fast as me

I hate when people accuse me of lolly gagging when I am clearly dilly dallying

How I cut carbs

Note: drawing of a pizza cutter [pic]

I have a conflict of no interest

I don’t have any bad habits. I’m good at them all

I hate it when people don’t know the difference between “your” and “you’re”.
There so stupid.

About Woody’s Chalkboard