Do lobster cops use rubber bands instead of handcuffs?
The Miss Universe pageant is fixed. Every winner has been from Earth
When in doubt I mumble and hope not to get muted
We all know babies come from storks, but do the heavier ones come from cranes?
Auld Lang Syne
confusing people since 1787
May all of your worries last as long as your new years resolutions
Conclusion:
The part of the paper when you get tired of thinking
Today’s hairstyle is called “I tried, but failed”
An upside down poet writes inverse
If you order cottage cheese for dinner, do you order off the la curd menu
It’s still stationary no matter how far you push the envelope
The septic tank failed at the sausage shop. It was the wurst smell ever.
I’d tell you a joke about air conditioners, but you’re probably not a fan
Sloppy grey hair is better than slicked back hair or no hair
Sir Cumference was the most well rounded knight at Arthur’s round table
My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned; couldn’t concentrate
I was messing around during the conference call today. I hope today is a hail mary.
With great power comes great electricity bill
About Woody’s Chalkboard
This is an ongoing list of Woody Paige’s chalkboard/blackboard quips from the ESPN show “Around The Horn”. This list was started in January 2008. You can read more about Woody’s chalkboard.
Additionally, you can get an RSS feed.
You can find Woody at woodypaige.com, on Facebook, Twitter, The Denver Post, and the Colorado Springs Gazette.
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