Secret Tip: If you check out all of the books in a library, you can start your own library
If you need to find a high tech toilet, just search for its IP address
I went to the store for eight Sprites. I got home and realized I picked seven up instead.
My house looks like I’m losing a game of Jumanji
I knew a lady who had a taser; man, was she stunning
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds
How does the man in the moon cut is hair? Eclipse it
With great power, comes great electricity bills
A guy just threw milk at me…how dairy
The most you can expect from me is unconditional *like*
Laugh at your problems; everybody else does
When in doubt, mumble
I’m not tense; I’m just terribly alert
The shinbone is a device for finding furniture
Is there a Rosetta Stone for learning to talk Starbucks?
Sometimes I just want to go where all the missing socks go
The older I get, the more I lose my looks, but I also lose my eyesight. So it evens out.
That light at the end of the tunnel is the fridge light at 2 a.m.
I am known at the gym as the “before picture”
About Woody’s Chalkboard
This is an ongoing list of Woody Paige’s chalkboard/blackboard quips from the ESPN show “Around The Horn”. This list was started in January 2008. You can read more about Woody’s chalkboard.
Additionally, you can get an RSS feed.
You can find Woody at woodypaige.com, on Facebook, Twitter, The Denver Post, and the Colorado Springs Gazette.
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