I tried 2 drown my sorrows but they learned 2 swim
I’ll have a diet soda w/2 sugars
NY guy says will trade wife 4 S.B. tix!!!

Note: Woody in NYC for Super Bowl

NY cop says I love pardon the horn

Note: Woody in NYC for Super Bowl

My statisticals are better than yours.

-Richard Sherman

Pot roast recipe
1. Buy one
2. Put in crock pot
3. Wait 10 hours
4. Serve

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Writing with chalk is pointless
I’m stupid, but I have a smart phone
Manning’s a money back guarantee
Why the long face, Bob?

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I'm confused
wait, maybe I'm not...

Spelling is difficoult hard

I started out with nothing. I still have most of it.
I don’t respond to anonymous mail.
Bolo ties are out. I’m wearing man Uggs
If plan “A” doesn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters
Proofread carefully to see if you any words out
You had me at the proper use of you’re
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