Woody’s Chalkboards

My opinions may change but not the fact that I am right

Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.

If I gave you a dollar, would you buy a clue?

I used to be indecisive, now I am not sure

Nostalgia is not what it used to be

He who laughs last thinks slowest

This space for lease

I forgive Pablo for being wrong

Note: Pablo = Pablo Torre, another panelist on the show

When nothing goes right, go left

To save time let’s just assume I’m always right

I’d flex, but I like this jacket.

I say what everybody else is thinking

I have a good memory, it’s just short.

Spare my time, not my feelings.

Keep calm and pet cats

I’m not crazy. I’m cat-like.

It’s my cat’s world. I’m just here to open cans.

Jerk-O-Lantern

Don’t worry the zombies are looking for brains, you’re safe.

A man’s gotta brew what a man’s gotta brew

About Woody’s Chalkboard