I think, therefore I am, I think
ATH Director is the best in the business. I’m ready for my close-up J.D.
Space heaters are the perfect housewarming gifts
Nobody is perfect, and I am nobody
I was about to tell a joke about time traveling, but you guys didn’t like it
Someone stole my coffee cup. Now I have to go to the police station and look at mug shots
I really want to buy one of those grocery checkout dividers, but every time the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back
I’m opening up a new place selling synonym twirls
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all of his Scrabble letters on the road. I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
My friend has been a limo driver for 25 years and has never had a customer. All that time and nothing to chauffeur it
President’s Day is just a sad reminder my wallet is filled with pictures of only the first one
According to my neighbor’s journal, I have “boundary issues”
Chalkboard available for birthday parties. I’ll bring the clown
Note: Arrow pointing at Woody
100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich have horses. How the stables have turned
A lot of conflict in the wild west could have been avoided if they had built their towns big enough for another person
I just had a once in a lifetime experience. I’ll never be doing that again
My neighbor knocked on my door at 2AM. Can you believe it, 2AM? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums