Cheesy pick-up lines
I won’t be impressed with technology until I can download food
The musician broke into song because he couldn’t find the key
Today my name is backboard
When is an Irish potato not Irish? When it’s a french fry

St. Patrick's Day Poll


Am I wearing underwear beneath my kilt? Y☐ N☐

I ate my Lucky Charms marshmellows this morning

Note: marshmellows [sic]

My bracket is already busted
The real bracket challenge: hanging my TV wall mount

Diet Rule #1
If nobody sees me eat it, it doesn't contain calories

If you think nothing is impossible try slamming a revolving door
My best advice is to not listen to advice, even this advice
Potatoes are the prettiest vegetables; all eyes are on them

Hey App Store can you make a fire?
No Matches

Should the Colts have signed Al Gore instead of Frank Gore?
My computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing
Being a couch potato is risky; someone may get hungry and eat you
Very few things blow my mind, unless it’s windy outside
The best part about writing a book is the book parties

Alarm Clocks for Sale
Buy one. You will sleep soundly

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